My girlfriend is backpacking without me. At what point is the anger and jealousy justified?

Hi, we are both 23, she hasnt been gone long but my girlfriend is backpacking around south america with her boy-mad friend and I am finding it extremely difficult to cope. She has had a large number of previous sexual partners but I trust she wont cheat on me. My problem is that she is spending every night staying up till 4-6am getting really drunk with big groups of guys in youth hostels. Both the girls are very outgoing but all I see in the pictures of their travels are them dancing around playin drinking games with topless lads. How would you feel in my position and what would you do? I am trying not to contact her too much but there are free computers in the hostels so I want her to always be letting me know she is ok and I have had many a sleepless night waiting for her to contact me. I dont want to seem to needy but I totally am. Is it unrealistic to want a 2 min message when she gets in from a wild night out with a load of strangers before she continues to party with them through the night. I am finding myself feeling sick when I think about her. I'm sure it will get better with time and i shall become a better, less jealous person from it, any ideas how to cope in the meantime?





Thanks alot for your time, any advice would be greatly appreciatedMy girlfriend is backpacking without me. At what point is the anger and jealousy justified?
She's 23!! you can't tie the girl down. Instead of worrying about her all the time, you should be spending this time hanging with your friends, going on trips with them basically living life!!





If she cheats on you then its not meant to be, theres no point staying up all night worrying about topless men when at the end of the day she either wants to be with you or not. And wouldn't you prefer she did it now if she was ever going to do it.





So my advice is just be happy she's having a good time, jealousy is a waste of energy when life is about living and being happy, just tell her you love her and hope shes having the time of her life, and while shes gone you should try to too.





Besta of luck dudeMy girlfriend is backpacking without me. At what point is the anger and jealousy justified?
Tell her you trust her fully. But it's still hard seeing her having so much fun without you, especially surrounded by a bunch of drunken shirtless guys.





Put an emphasis on your concern for her safety. Tell her that you read a lot about local guys abusing traveling girls, and you just want her to be safe.





Odds are she'll be a little more considerate in her communications with you.
I think that's too much, just realize that you can't turn a partygirl into a housewife, and no it won't get better with time, you are letting her run all over you and she knows it, if she cared about you at all she wouldn't be going, so if i were you i would just end it before it gets more out of control.
From one point I can see her side that she is young and having adventures and making memories..





On the other hand, as a girlfriend, I wouldn't treat my boyfriend like that, I respect his feelings more than that...





So I think that you should confront her and if you two still disagree on what is respectful to each other then you should break up
Hm, why didn't you go backpacking with them?





You are in your right to be on edge, hell I would be. But you can still be on edge and trust some one. Just try not to say anything that would be over the top.


You'll be aright man.
get down there and surprise her
Just imagine that you and your gf have been married for several years and she tells you she wants to go backpacking with a boy-mad gf where they will stay in youth hostels and drink and party till late in the night. Does that really sound like something a married woman should do?? Well I sure don't think so! I'm sure I wouldn't even have to think about it if my husband wanted to do such a thing. If he even asked, I'd be hurt to the core. If he did it, I wouldn't be home when he got back.





So, yes you have every right to feel insecure and jealous. So here's what to do. Don't be available when or if she calls and don't text her, or email her or ask her anything. Stop communicating with her and let HER worry for once. She's out there having the time of her life and you're sitting at home expecting her to give you a few crumbs. Well, don't do it anymore. Go out with your friends and don't answer her calls or return her emails. In this way you are truly letting her go and letting her decide if she's crazy about you. If she doesn't worry about you not communicating then it's over. But as long as you're asking her what's going on and why hasn't she written and can't she at least spare 2 minutes after partying, etc etc she's got you right where she wants you--waiting on pins and needles for her crumbs.





Be strong and let her get a taste of her own medicine. Let her worry about you not contacting her and see if she starts communicating a lot better or even cutting her trip short!
Looks like this has to do with you and her we see her side but what is yours. Seems she could be venting at something you did but I don't know, Never mind you two have issues, If she keeps bringing up the past and flaunting it. How would you feel in my position and what would you do? I would say thanks for the memory but bye-bye birdie. Why would you want to deal with the drama. Get better with time oh really so keep crawling back for more, Sorry but you have dumb *** written on your forehead.
Honey, it is not going to get better with time. Your girlfriend is giving you a taste of what your life is going to be if you stay with her. She is a party girl and you won't be able to change that. If she once had a large number of sexual partners then chances are that she will sleep with guys while she on vacation. You got involved with a girl that is wild that loves parties and that loves to drink. That should be a red flag for you.And if you are not hearing from her then that should tell you that you are not her first priority. I hate to say this but that girl is not in love with you. If she was really in love with you then she wouldn't want you to worry. And she couldn't be days without getting in touch with you. I think you need to have a long talk with your girlfriend when she gets back. I hate to say this but you should also get tested for STD. If your girlfriend loves to drink and loves to party and had a large number of sexual partners then you should be concern about what she can transmit to you.